Mei has removed me from her social media, though she hasn’t blocked me (thankfully) and I’m unsure why, the girl is not talking to me even when I tried to reach out to her after my 10km run in the city last Sunday. I am once again lost and I haven’t felt this way since my ex dumped me back in May. After her and I talked two weeks ago I thought we cleared out all the things that needed to be said, I thought we reached an understanding especially of who I am as a person including all the things she called childish.
I am fortunate to have my other two best friends in the U.S to seek advice, they have been comforting and giving me hope but I hope this matter is not a permanent issue and I have to say goodbye to a ‘best friend’ of 16 years, I haven’t told anyone else yet. It has been the dilemna I been trying to understand in my head this past week and I’m glad work hasn’t been too crazy that leaves me flailing over both social and work lives. I’m once again left in the dark and yes I am airing it out in my blog because I know this gets read.
Work has been ok, we had to say goodbye to one our new girls as she was not coping and I will admit that I got teary saying goodbye, it sucks being an empath and feeling the emotions of those around me especially if they are sad. I try to keep everyone upbeat but sometimes I need the positivity for myself too. We have two successful, new Reservation agents joining us soon. One is part time and the other is full time and both with experience in Front desk/reservations of hotels. Can’t wait to meet them soon.
I have reached that stage in my life, probably comes with the no filter and being 30 years old that I am not seeking a relationship anytime soon, it probably is because the previous one has damaged me emotionally again and every one that has tried to get closer have been placed in that unfortunate friend zone. I figured with everything that has been going on that I’ll just focus on myself which is further emphasis on my career and travelling of course.
Since I am not going to South Korea anymore, I am deciding that I’ll go to Japan in their Spring time (really want to be there for the cherry blossom festival) and then go the United States for their Autumn. Need to see Katie again and finally meet my other bestie Aria.
Positives at the closure of this week;
I beat last year’s time of Blackmore’s 10km run by 6mins, mum called it a new PB (Personal best) though my right foot killed two days after the run. My younger sister did hers in 50mins easy, she is becoming more comfortable as a marathon runner than a sprinter
My Royalty Soaps arrived yesterday! I have yet to unwrap them but they look so cute, I’m not sure if I would use them though but they both smell amazing- Macaron and cookies and cream
My fashion is changing, though I’m keeping to the vintage/1940s look, I am also unlocking my inner Lolita and submissive nature which isn’t hiding as much anymore. I bought two elastic harnesses from Mary Jane lingerie arrived two days ago and they fit well and look great under v-neck tops especially.
Read through two new books and addicted to both series, the next novel isn’t out until next year though. Reading again has helped me write my stories more too.
Dad is going out for dinner with my sister tonight, so its mum and I at home tonight, mother/daughter bonding!
I am in a bit of an off mood since I woke up this morning though it is getting better being in the positive environment of work and chatting to my international friends on Facebook on the way into work. I think two big reasons why I’m feeling aggravated is partially because a bloody thunderstorm woke me up early this morning.
I didn’t check what time it was but according to my colleagues it had started at 4am, I must have been light sleeping because usually storms do not wake me up. I hope I will not have my 2pm crash from the lack of sleep.
The other reason is the need for personal space even on a bus that is packed to the front because all the other corporates are returning to work this week. There is one particular man who has sat next to me before and has a tendency to doze off and therefore leaning on me.
I don’t mind taking public transport at all as long as I have some space between myself and the passenger beside me. But there is always a certain group of men that do not know this term, I physically have to put my arm down and slightly push them away if they get too close.
I mean really, just because we are squished like sardines, does not mean they have to completely compact to the point that is too awkward and you can’t move. Not all the passengers are like this thankfully but lack of sleep and passengers did not give me a good morning. The rain has stopped outside and I’m hoping for an uneventful Tuesday.
While I am on dark and Autumn colours on Second Life with snippets of Halloween costumes, I am still wearing plenty of pink while on IMVU. Though I do have a couple of outfits that are black with the arrival of the spooky month.
There is a much bigger variety of pink rooms and clothes in the IMVU community and that is majority thanks to it’s designers who always keep up with the trends of reality. Though a lot of my clothes are found in the DD/bbg lifestyle, I wouldn’t call myself a babygirl. Didn’t 8 years ago when I first realised my submissive tendencies and not now either being a full fledged submissive into kitten play.
My pink fashion varies between harnesses and tiny skirts to casual white tees and boy shorts that are seen in the comfort of my own home then out in the public eye. Though if the rooms are empty, I might go into them to take a picture of my look of the day. The above two outfits were made before my Europe holiday and I have since changed the hair creator for my avatar since everyone is using Java nowadays..
Sometimes I wish that Second Life implements the fashion that IMVU gives to its users, there is too much kink wear seen even in main stream fashion events”and though I love wearing harnesses and garters, I do like the casual outfits that the tamer pixel universe releases to the public. When it comes to my fashion on IMVU, I have applied what I’ve done on Second Life by searching through favourite creators.
The rain mixed with the cold weather of winter is never a good combination especially when you have been working for seven days straight at work, this is me currently. I did it as a favour for one of the guest service agents who wanted Friday off and rather than split our days off, we decided to swap our weekend completely. I don’t mind, I have tomorrow and Monday off and hoping that the rain holds off tomorrow so my family, bestie Mei and I can check out Vivid in the city.
I was originally going to vent under the sub heading of Neko Irritation but decided not to and instead just place it here in my diary entry. All my good friends know that I cannot stand fair-weather friends (A friend who is only a friend when circumstances are pleasant or profitable. At the first sign of trouble, these capricious, disloyal friends will drop their relationship with you.) I have had my fair share of them online, none in reality of course because it is a whole different ball game beyond the computer.
But online, you have so many and it usually occurs of when they striving to climb the pixel social ladder or wanting a boyfriend or a man who is DTF, I sadly had to release a fair-weather friend last night after my gut feeling became true. And it wasn’t just me, two of my other girl friends noticed it too and also deleted this friend. It is quite unfortunate because I knew her on IMVU for the past 5 years? And she helped me re-do my avatar when I returned to that pixel universe. Let’s just hope she knows what she is doing…
The top five likes from the past 9 days;
Cadbury bars- I have lessened my sugar intake so having a bar of chocolate sates the craving
Golden State Warriors are still leading in NBA finals
My flickr has reached 1,100 followers tonight 😀 Thank you all
Wonder Woman! I need to watch it again, it was absolutely amazing and Gal is soaring high!
Family time last weekend after AM shift, I don’t get much time with my cousins but when I do it is always crazy in a good way
It started off cruising when I woke up this morning after an enjoyable dinner out with the family last night for Mother’s Day. Checking my usual Second Life facebook of what everyone else in my friends list are doing at present when I came across a post I had commented on about three days ago and it was suddenly alive again with new comments. The original post was made by an acquaintance who spoke about wanting a companion in-world but found herself always batting away the standard horny men in any place she went to.
A lot of us females had agreed with this sentiment, I had personally added it was getting worse with the increase of shopping events and new clubs that were very hyper-sexual and the lack of morals surrounding people because they could hide behind the anonymity of their avatars. It wasn’t until a new comment was posted by one of her mutual friends, a man that the only mutual friend I had was her and what he had commented was simply appalling. He basically said that because we dressed our pixels in “half naked” clothes or lingerie, we were putting ourselves out there to be cat called or receive the horny messages from the men.
This is just a case of slut shaming and victim blaming like it occurs during a rape case, that the woman who was assaulted shouldn’t have worn a short dress or mini shorts, it is her fault that the man had raped her. I was so angry at what this douche had said and I wasn’t the only one, I replied to his comment saying that us females should be able to wear what we like, what we wear is not an open invitation to be harassed by men even if its our pixels and just because we have certain fetishes or kinks it does not warrant us to rude behaviour. Needless to say it went over the man’s head and he couldn’t seem to bring himself to understand what the rest of us were telling him. Instead he called the original poster a “snobby bitch” and this is why no man respected her.
Freeform upfronts were on today and there was no Shadowhunters season 3 announcement, after all that talk on Instagram last week after Spoiler tv released an article saying that they had quietly renewed it. Why would they quietly renew it, if it had been renewed we would have gotten a live announcement on Facebook just like what they did last year when announcing Season 2 to the fandom.
I think they haven’t announced it yet because it is either pending or they want us to get hyped up for 2b being released in June, not long to go now so can’t wait to see it, though the two teasers they released yesterday was so-so, more Climon bullshit with the appearance of them sleeping together, as an avid Clace fan, Clary’s first time is suppose to be with Jace and that is what makes it even more special after everything that has been thrown at them as a couple.
But I’ve already vented about this on other Shadowhunter instagram pages and shared opinions with other Clace fans, we will wait and see what happens especially with the arrival of Sebastian, the real brother of Clary and another pursuer of her affections.
I haven’t vented in either its own sub heading or my diary entries since last year and this is a good thing, I haven’t allowed negative juju cloud my small space in the cyber world or allow anger to take up my mentality. However I will vent about something this early morning before I head into bed. Originally it was gonna be spitting anger two days ago, now that I have clucked to my girls in the Hen Den and told my bestie Mei, I am feeling a lot better.
Now those who read my blog dilligently noted that I have been returning to IMVU, confessed between myself and a couple of the girls in the Hen Den we had agree that Second Life has become hypersexual in community and new events. I have noticed it majorly and I don’t even go to the adult sims or clubs anymore. It is increasing especially with the overwhelming presence of teenagers with no restrictions of age group on that virtual universe.
Since returning to IMVU, I decided to re-create a public space for myself and anyone who wanted to hang out when I was online. I was also looking for a homey area very much like my cottage on SL. Thus my New York apartment originally designed for East Highland high character Elizabeth James was re-used and became my own apartment. My group of girlies absolutely love it and find themselves staying there chilling out if alt tabbed or working. Anyone who is friends with me, know how passionate I am when it comes to being original even if its the virtual world. In both style and home decorating, I pride myself in doing highly detailed rooms.
Which is why the next bit had me so mad all day, one of the former friends/enemies that I knew from EHHS days decided to enter my apartment when I was offline and wishlist a whole lot of the decorations I have in the public room. It is called being original and creeping into my apartment is just stalker levels! Though I admit I creeped her wishlist too and that is how I found out about her wishlisting the stuff from my home in the first place. This isn’t the first time she’s copied me though, she has imitated my look but kept her blonde locks while doing it. I wish people stopped copying, originality still isn’t dead, they should try it.
I watched Beauty and the Beast last night with a group of work girlfriends at this event in our local cinema called Chicks at the Flicks, never been to one before and enjoyed the experience as much as I adored the movie! Dan Stevens won me over as the Beastly prince ❤
Tumblr is hooked on the growl he does when in Prince form, I admit I am besotted too 😛